I was Punctured

Yesterday I managed to get to work despite having a foot that the Chinese would call 猪脚. My right foot is swollen after the last soccer game, and it hurts when I have to walk long distances, like from the bus stop to the office. My wife had asked me to go see a Chinese Physician, but I had not heeded her advice on Sunday. Then when I told my friend, Kwang Fei, about it, he recommended this place along Changi Road that his father visits. It’s basically a clicnic where the physician fixes muscle aches, sprains, performs acupucntures and stuff like that. “Hmm…” I said, still thinking about it when Kwang Fei said, “What you want? 推拿 ah?! Ha! Ha! Ha!”. Wah lau eh… But he sort of convinced me that I needed to get this foot fixed when he mentioned about age…

Anyway, my wife and I arranged to go visit the one at Ang Mo Kio Ave 3, which was supposed to be quite popular. I was late due to the long long bus ride, that flattened (and numbed) my Ka Chng and threatened to worsen my condition. The place was packed and I did not get to see the physician until about 8:30pm.

I told him what happened, and he asked me some questions, then said it is best not to drag such things, and asked me to lie down on the bed, starting to explain the whole “operation” to me. He bent my leg, touched my foot and showed me a chart on the wall, explaining that 2 areas of my foot were damaged. Some ligament problem and said that was why my foot was swollen. Machiam Michael Owen or Wayne Rooney’s broken foot. After that he told me to grab the back of the bed tightly, so that when he pulls the ligaments into place, there is resistance. He even did a rehearsal of the pulling process, by showing how it’s done using the left leg. Pulling was done very quickly and painlessly.

Then he got me to turn on my side and he applied some weird electric currents to parts of my foot. That was weird as I could feel the currents, but it was not painful. Next he asked if I was acceptable to having acupuncture. He said it would help the healing process, but it is fine if I did not want it. That got me worried a little, as I am seldom given a choice when it comes to such things. What do I know about acupuncture right? I thought for like 2 seconds, then decided what the heck, I am already here. Besides, my wife was in the room too… cannot be chicken… So that was how I got punctured for the very first time. I’m glad to say I survived that ordeal pretty well, and the acupuncture process took only a few seconds. I only felt the needles poking but that was all.

After that, the physician asked me to get off the bed and I was like thinking, “Huh, done? That’s all?”. He showed me how to walk without limping, by shifting my weight from leg to leg, without bending the knees (basically walk like a goondoo robot with a few screws loose). Maybe I should do the Moonwalk.